I know first hand that losing a pet, in my case my springer spaniel Charlie, can be overwhelming. Most owners look at their dogs than more than just an animal, they’re members of the family. Losing them is heart breaking and can bring on a heavy sense of emptiness and is why coping with losing a pet can be difficult.

Each person deals with grief differently, but that doesn’t make the death any less painful. Some people find it hard to express their feelings because not everyone around them understands the gravity of the loss, especially if they have never had a pet of their own.

You May Feel Lost For A While

Many of us share an intense love and bond with our pets. A pet can add structure to your day, keep you active and social, help you to overcome setbacks and challenges in life, and even provide a sense of meaning or purpose. So, when a cherished pet dies, it’s normal to feel lost. The pain of loss can often feel overwhelming and trigger all sorts of painful and difficult emotions. While some people may not understand the depth of feeling you had for your pet, you should never feel guilty or ashamed about grieving the loss of a pet.

While we all respond to loss differently, the level of grief you experience will often depend on factors such as your age and personality, the age of your pet, and the circumstances of their death. Generally, the more significant your pet was to you, the more intense the emotional pain you will feel.

The role your pet played in your life can also have an impact. For example, if your pet was a working dog, service animal, or therapy animal, you’ll not only be grieving the loss of a companion but also the loss of a co-worker, the loss of your independence, or the loss of emotional support. If you lived alone and the pet was your only companion, coming to terms with their loss can be even harder. Furthermore, if you were unable to afford expensive veterinary treatment to prolong your pet’s life, you may even feel a profound sense of guilt.

While experiencing loss is an inevitable part of owning a pet, there are healthy ways to cope with the pain, come to terms with your grief, and when the time is right, perhaps even open your heart to another pet.

Everybody’s Grief Is Different

Grieving is a highly individual experience. Some people find grief following the loss of a pet comes in stages, where they experience different feelings such as denial, anger, guilt, depression, and eventually acceptance and resolution. Others find that their grief is more cyclical, coming in waves, or a series of highs and lows. The lows are likely to be deeper and longer at the beginning and then gradually become shorter and less intense as time goes by. Still, even years after a loss, a sight, a sound, or a special anniversary can spark memories that trigger a strong sense of grief.

Some people start to feel better in weeks or months. For others, the grieving process is measured in years. Whatever your grief experience, it is important to be patient with yourself and allow the process to naturally unfold. Exhibiting feelings of sadness, shock and loneliness do not mean you are weak or your feelings are somehow misplaced. It just means that you are mourning the loss of an animal you loved, so you shouldn’t feel ashamed. Trying to ignore your pain or keep it from surfacing will only make it worse in the long run. For real healing, it is necessary to face your grief and actively deal with it. By expressing your grief, you will likely need less time to heal than if you bottle up your feelings. Write about your feelings or talk about them with others who are sympathetic to your loss.

When Is The Right Time To Say Goodbye To A Sick Pet?

This can be the hardest decision you ever have to make as a pet owner. It was devastating for me, but I could not bare to see my Charlie in pain and unable to walk. When making the decision, remember to think about what is best for your pet, however tough that may be. No case is the same, so talking to your vet will help. As they are less emotionally involved, it can be easier for them to think about what is best for your pet, and they will help talk you through the options available. Charlie hated the vets, so we had a vet come to the house. He was very comfortable, we were all with him and able to say goodbye properly and in our own timeframe.

Things We Can Do To Help With The Process

Sorrow and grief are normal and natural responses to death. Like grief for our friends and loved ones, grief for our animal companions can only be dealt with over time, but there are healthy ways to cope with the pain:

• Don’t let anyone tell you how to feel – Listen to your emotions
• Reach out to others who have lost pets – Social media was great for this
• Rituals can help healing – You may want to hold a small funeral as a family
• Create a legacy – Plant a tree or create a memorial plaque
• Look after yourself – Exercise if you can and eat a balanced diet. Do not use alcohol to mask your emotions
• If you have other pets, try to maintain their normal routine
• Seek professional help if you need it – pet bereavement service

I hope this information helps in some way? If you have any questions or want to chat, feel free to leave a comment. You may have missed our last blog that discusses what to consider when getting a new pet.

As always, thanks for reading.

Louisa on behalf of GOOCHI POOCHI